How a visual routine can smooth out rough behaviors

Is your family struggling in the morning or at bedtime?

I hear from so many families that getting ready to leave for school in the morning as well as getting ready for bedtime is an absolute nightmare. Screaming, running away, protesting, stalling, all of the typical behaviors I hear of small children who don’t want to go to bed. As parents, we are exhausted by the end of the day and just wishing and hoping tonight will be the night that my child will gladly skip into their room and go through their bedtime routine without a hitch. Unfortunately, most of the time, this is not the case. 

Research shows that routines and structure support healthy social emotional development in early childhood. Children are most confident and secure when daily activities are predictable and familiar. Constant chaos in a child’s daily life can lead to anxiety, emotion dysregulation, defiance, tantrums, and aggressive behavior. All of the behaviors that often trigger us as parents, maintaining the cycle of frustration and exhaustion at the end of the day.

Creating a visual morning routine or bedtime routine can help instill predictability and consistency in the household, leading to better emotion regulation, compliance, and an overall happier experience for everyone involved. This visual can be anything you want it to be. It can be as creative as including your child’s favorite princess, to as simple as typing something out on a word document. Include 5-6 steps that the child will follow in the routine to move toward the ultimate goal- getting out the door or bed. It can be a checklist that the child marks off with a white erase marker, or a tab that the child folds to show that activity has been completed. Once implanting the visual, stick to the visual. Sure there may be a few times when you read 3 books instead of 2, but do your best to provide your child with the predictable and routine activities that they expect.